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EJ Koh Reads

                             Clearance

I browsed CIA.gov
for jobs.

On the online application
I marked spots for
    Targeting Officer
    Intelligence Collection Analyst
    Counterterrorism Methodologist
    and Librarian.

The text said:
Be prepared to undergo a thorough investigation
examining your life’s history, soundness of judgment, freedom
from conflicting allegiances, protection of sensitive information,
    potential to be coerced, and a Polygraph test
.

[The CIA spied on me for twelve months]

They found
    I watched more porn than most women.
They found
    I wrestled and, upon demanding an opponent twice above my weight class,
    was publicly humiliated.
They found
    I drank a cup of holy water at a wedding.
They found
    I cannot hold my bladder past two hours, making me uneasy
    in places where a bathroom is not readily available: subways, banks,
    bars, liquor stores, boats, elevators, parks, outdoor malls, small offices,
    beaches, buses, waiting rooms, and funerals.
They found
    I lied about speaking French.
They found
    “How to disable a bomb” in my Google search history.
They found
    I pass international customs with suitcases full
    of red meat, greens, and seeds into the country.
They found
    no drug use in the past two years.
They found
    my elementary teacher asked why I’d try for the spelling bee,
    she asked what the biggest word I knew was
    so I said “masturbation” and she sent me home with a red card.
They found
    I lie to people older than me
    and tell the truth to younger people.
They found
    a Davis high school baseball team bullied me
    by flipping my chair and making squinty eyes
    I tried to choke one of them
    and was removed from class.
They found
    I laugh at racist jokes.
They found
    I feel responsible for the death of my two parakeets
    and my grandmother.
They found
    I never litter.
They found
    I was fifteen when a Korean hairstylist proposed to me
    inside a McDonald’s in Tokyo, Japan.
They found
    I danced for a Hip Hop team for two years
    by whom I felt largely betrayed.
They found
    my mother worked a shopping mall cart and fainted
    when a customer stole an expensive makeup kit.
They found
    I believe in God.
They found
    I’m not particularly smart.

The CIA called
to say I passed
my security clearances.
    Only the very best of the men and women comprise
    the Agency’s workforce to safeguard some of the nation’s
    most sensitive information and highest standards of integrity.



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EJ Koh
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